…sed mutato nomine te fabula narratur…

Christchurch, as it turns out, is a very nice city, with a nice, small city center and enough to do to keep anyone occupied for at least a couple of days. Thus, I had originally planned on writing a sort of comprehensive travel guide for the entire city, but while writing my review of the Canterbury Museum, I got a bit carried away – so instead of getting my take on the town, here is a review of JUST the Canterbury Museum in Christchurch, because I felt like writing one… apparently. There’s a bit on the Antarctic Centre at the end though, so feel free to skip most of this article  if you were planning on going there and skipping the museum!
My first impression of the Christchurch was that it tried very hard to seem as “British” as possible. Being situated right in the middle of the Canterbury Planes will do that to a city, it appears. So there is a neo-gothic boy’sd school and cathedral, a very comprehensive war monument, and to top it all off, some “Edwardian” punters, who will take you across the Avon (yes, the Avon), for a small fee. Also, the tram driver had a big moustache.

But underneath that veneer of Britishness, Christchurch is very much a city in its own right, with a very Kiwi atmosphere and a lot to offer that is not – or at least, not overtly – imitating imperial traditions.

Standing proudly as a testament to this mixture of modern and imperial, is the Canterbury Museum. At its heart, it does its best to give an overview of the history of the south island from the moa hunters of old, until the early 20th century. Now, Te Papa, this ain’t, but still they do an admirable job of making history come alive, with the obligatory mannequins dressed as Maori tribespeople, interactive displays, and even an entire street reconstructed from 19th-century Christchurch! Bonus display in that particular section must have been the museum-in-a-museum, a glimpse of what the museum originally looked like, with plaster casts of British Museum exhibits, a Ravenna mosaic (a small one!), a stuffed hippo: everything a New Zealand gentleman needs to feel worldly and wise. Fun! Also well worth fifteen minutes of your time is a reconstructed paua-shell-house-cum-collection-of-oddities, built in the early 60s by one of the cutest couples you have ever seen a 6-minute documentary about. If you grow old like those two, and get your house to be featured in a museum after your death, you must have done something right.

Much to my surprise, the idea of having a museum within the museum actually continues to this very day: on the second floor, a mummy was on display, complete with explanations on how mummification works, and also some dinosaur skeletons that were not native to New Zealand. It only then dawned on me that here, on the other side of the world (from my cozy European perspective), people have as much right to see the glory of Egyptian culture, or an actual, North-American Allosaur, as people in Berlin, Paris, Leiden, Trier (yes they have a mummy), London, or even Cairo! For some reason, this put the reconstructed meta-museum in the recontructed street in a slightly different persepective: the old function of the museum as an educative insitution instead of just something to entertain was in full swing here, and rightly so! I almost feel ashamed for expecting only galleries of Maori art, stuffed kiwis, and pictures of colonial art. Suddenly, Canterbury Museum, has become a museum for tourists and locals alike.

There are two more parts in the exhibition. The first features information about the area of Canterbury itself, with lots of helpful (coercive) information about recycling, sustainability, and how we must treat Mother Earth with respect or our kids (and mind you, this exhibition was geared heavily towards kids, who would undoubtedly proceed to cast apprehensive glances at their parents for fucking up the planet so badly) would have no liveable life to speak of. I always get terribly self-conscious at these kinds of exhibits. Really, I try to do my best to live as guilt-free as possible, but it seems I’m not even doing enough. Damn you, Museum, for pointing out my shortcomings to me!! Then, a vague feeling of dread creeps up as well: are others feeling equally guilty for not doing their part to save the planet? Do they even realise that the real-life counterparts to those cute enlarged animals are actually busy destroying the local ecosystem? That the comically presented statistics about water use are meant to change people’s behaviour under the shower (mea culpa!)? That this exhibition, in avoiding to be preachy, may in the end only reach those who are already aware of the problems that we are dealing with? Or are those the people who go to museums in the first place? Or am I just creating my own problems and should I enjoy the message? Questions questions questions… the fact that some of the photos, pictures and models look like they were made in the 1980s and that the problems they deal with have not yet been solved, does not help in alleviating my doubts. But hey! There’s a mummy! I wonder what its carbon footprint is – how did it even get here?

…

Oh, stop it!

Or actually, speaking of the environment and carbon footprints and unspoilt nature and all, the last bit of the Museum was about the Antarctic, and some of the people who had travelled there. Interesting stuff! They had Edmund Hillary’s original Hagglund there, as well as a coracle built by some sailors who were shipwrecked on the aptly named Disappointment Island in the early 20th century. They apparently used the only tree on the island to save their lives – how’s that for destroying an ecosystem?!? But I digress… These few rooms truly gave a fascinating insight into the lives and minds of the weirdos who thought it would be a good idea to reach the South Pole on foot or something – you know, the type who seem to have inspired the phrase “brave but stupid”. Turns out they weren’t all that stupid after all (or were they?), and reading the final page of Scott’s diary really shows the lengths to which these people went to uncover the earth’s secrets. These days, all you need is a really really powerful microscope, it seems (yes I know that’s not a microscope).

Visiting that part of the Museum inpired me to shell out $55,- for the Antarctic Centre the following day, urged on by the promise on the leaflet that Antarctica would be “Mine For The Day”. Well, what can I say? It was … underwhelming, even though I do not really know why. Was it that the artificial -18C windchill can also be experienced on any given winter night in Berlin? That the groups or tourists were annoying as hell without even doing much?  That it was, maybe, just maybe, a tad small? I guess, in the end, none of the above. The Centre really does an admirable job of bringing the Antarctic over to a liveable climate, and I was especially struck by the descriptions and pictures of camp life, as well as by the hall devoted to the continent itself. And of course the Little Blue Penguins were as annoyingly cute as would be expected. I guess, without wanting to sound too emo, that this attraction really is geared either towards kids OR towards groups of two or more people. It’s fun of course, experiencing a Hagglund ride all on your own, but it would maybe have been MORE fun with someone to share it with. Like, someone you know. Same goes for the clothes that you can try on. Why wear 8 layers of wool if there’s no one to take your picture? I tried very hard to like the Antarctic Centre, but despite all its obvious qualities (and those awesome little penguins), I felt somewhat let down.

So there, two “educational” experiences to be had in Christchurch.  One, the Antarctic Experience, could well be worth a full day if you’re willing to make the effort to do all the activities and read all the signs, but to me, there seemed to be something off in the balance between education and entertainment. The other, the Canterbury Museum, is steeped in the British traditions that pervade the entire town – among which used to be the thought that museums are there to educate the people about the world around them (later on, after having read something about the first settlements on the Canterbury plains, I discovered that that seems indeed to have been the plan). Although this can be off-putting to people who aren’t into museums like I am, it still is a great way to spend anything from half an hour to an entire afternoon (I did both), learn something about the area and plan your visit to the Botanic Gardens behind the museum afterwards – I recommend the museum cafe, which offers great views on said garden.

Either way, your time will be well spent!